Today, I'm not 30s in progress. I'm ageless and making no progress. I'm motionless, inspiration free, and drifting in a windless ocean of I'd-rather-be-home-sleeping-right-now. I feel like garbage and I look it, too. Two weeks of partying, working, class, soccer-ing, and trying to keep up with everyone and everything has caught up to me, and IT is kicking my ass. If only I were impervious to pain as I was once was (back in the 90's, yes).
I don't want your sympathy though. Sympathy leads to weakness, weakness leads to dependence, and dependence leads to... the Dark Side?! Shit, Yoda was right all along. It's a good damn thing that I kept my lightsaber from 3rd grade.
And so, as I sit here at work, not progressing (and not working), something occurred to me. I don't have to progress today. I "have to do" nothing, nada, non niente, rien, nichts. In fact, everything that I do, and everything that I am responsible for, was created out of my own choice. There is no reason to be stressed, worriful, or anxious. Those are emotions that I've created in a false state of mind as I attempt to control what I cannot control. There is only what I choose to do, and what I choose not to do.
Today, I choose to do one thing at a time. Today, I choose to do... not a whole helluva lot. Today, I don't care what you think about me. Today, I'm just going to be Sean.
Who are you going to be today?
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